John Diez

The Lesson You Must Learn Before You’re Ready For Love Again, Based On Your Zodiac + Tarot

Aries

Your Card: Five of Cups

Your inability to let go of the past is what is keeping you stuck there, Aries. It’s easy to sit there and wonder “What if things had gone differently?” but the fact of the matter is nothing can change that now. No matter how many times you replay the same scenario over and over again, it doesn’t change where you are now. By remaining in the past, you are closing yourself off from the future. It’s hard to let go of the good times because many of us fear that those good times will never happen again. But this isn’t true. This is only the case if we choose to live in the past. By embracing the future, we are opening up the door to experiences and people who fulfill us just as much if not more than the past did. Trust in this and do not fear what is not known. 

Taurus

Your Card: Ace of Swords

You’re not supposed to have all the answers right now, Taurus. You don’t have to know it all to be able to fall in love again. Not everything has to be accounted for. You don’t have to obsessively psychoanalyze yourself, every area of your life, and the person you’re with to make sure it’s working. This need to know the analytical ins and outs of every relationship you become a part of is unnecessary. It doesn’t make you more equipped to handle the heartbreaks and setbacks. It doesn’t make you less susceptible to fucking up. If anything, this obsessive need to know everything is detrimental. It makes you more rigid and stubborn, unable to see the other side of things. It sucks the joy out of falling in love. Don’t let that be the case. Don’t reduce love to a textbook definition. 

Gemini

Your Card: Four of Swords

Falling in love shouldn’t be emotionally exhausting, Gemini. That is not to say that relationships don’t have their ups and downs that do become draining at times. I’m referring specifically to the process of falling in love. The early stages. You’re so used to the vicissitudes of toxic love that at times you mistake a slow-burn emotional connection with incompatibility. Love is supposed to take time. It’s not supposed to smack you in the face. Don’t confuse pain and longing with love. These two things are not synonymous with one another. At times you have a habit of injecting drama where there is none so you feel more comfortable. Stillness is suspicious to you. Don’t create problems where there is none and don’t confuse toxicity with passion. The Four of Swords represents the need to rest from strife. Re-familiarize yourself with stillness, Gemini. You’ve gotten so used to chaos, that you confuse it with peace. 

Cancer

Your Card: The Devil

Ask yourself something, Cancer. What are you chasing? Is your pursuit of love really about the need for a fulfilling partnership or are you running from a part of yourself you’re too afraid to face? Do you use love to cope with something? Is love a distraction from the problems in your life you don’t want to face? These are not reasons to fall in love, Cancer. By choosing to ignore your own personal issues and using romantic love as a band-aid, you are only allowing these issues to simmer under the surface until it all boils over and turns into a mess you cannot hide from. Before you are ready to love again, you must first learn to deal with your baggage alone and stop abusing love and using it as a distraction. 

Leo

Your Card: Seven of Wands

In a viral moment, Keanu Reeves jokingly made a point to Drew Barrymore that if you’re a lover then you’re a fighter because “…if you don’t fight for your love, what kind of lover are you?” As corny as it sounds, he has a point. And with the Seven of Wands, I think this principle applies to you, Leo. You’re so used to attracting attention that you sometimes get lazy. What I mean by this is that you expect things to just happen for you. But the reason why you’re not ready to love again is because you’re not willing to fight for it. You give up too easily. You expect everybody else to do the work for you. This cannot be, Leo. Any relationship, romantic or otherwise, requires give and take from both ends. You cannot expect your lover to fight for you if you are unwilling to fight for them. People are not replaceable. Fight for what matters. 

Virgo

Your Card: Ace of Cups

Love without fear, Virgo. You are scared of falling in love because you’re scared of being vulnerable with someone. You hold on to the idea that with vulnerability comes a chance of getting hurt. See that’s the thing, you’re gonna get hurt in life no matter what, love is no different. To hold yourself back out of fear is limiting yourself from the possibilities that present themselves to you. You see vulnerability as a weakness but this isn’t true. You need to learn that the act of falling in love itself is not a weakness. To allow yourself to feel something deeply and emotionally profound is not indicative of a lack of self-control. There is strength in letting down your walls because accepting the possibility of getting hurt shows courage. You’re not afraid of what might happen because you know at the end of the day, you’re strong enough to learn from it, grow from it, and heal. You must learn how to reframe the meaning of your emotions before you are ready for love again. 

Libra

Your Card: Five of Wands

You must learn how to advocate for yourself, Libra. You’re used to always being the peacemaker in your relationships. You feel as if you must always “be the bigger person” and swallow your pride just to make things right but never do you receive the same level of maturity back. Before you are ready to love again, you must learn how to advocate for yourself and what you need. Being the bigger person doesn’t have to mean babying the people around you. Unless you learn how to put your foot down and say what’s on your mind, you’ll always have this resentment brewing inside of you which is poisonous to any love. You let this happen because deep down inside you believe your needs don’t matter. You’ve gotten so used to walking on eggshells that you’ve taught yourself it’s best to just ignore the things that bother you and set aside your own needs for the sake of keeping the peace. But the funny thing is, you will never find peace by ignoring your own needs. Sometimes to find peace, we must embrace conflict, not run from it. 

Scorpio

Your Card: Knight of Wands

While there is nothing wrong with having standards or a list of qualities that are non-negotiable to you, there is something wrong with expecting perfection in love and within a partner. Perfection does not exist. Scorpio, you need to learn how to give more chances. Almost no one is better at giving the cold shoulder than you but sometimes you tend to be a bit too dismissive. Once things start to take a turn, you’re mentality is very much so “thank you, next” but love is not about who is worth being with, love is about who is worth fighting for. No one is perfect, especially not you. Give more chances and be more open-minded. Don’t think you’re settling just because they’re not checking off all the boxes. You expect perfection when you can’t even provide perfection. 

Sagittarius

Your Card: Knight of Swords

You need to learn how to be more decisive about the person that you want to be so that you know the kind of person you want to be with. You’re constantly looking for new ways to reinvent yourself. You love the idea of starting all over again and reintroducing yourself to the world but there tends to be a lack of stability in this pattern. Though your ability to grow and change into a better version of yourself is one of your greatest strengths, it might also indicate a lack of a sense of self. If you don’t know exactly who you are, then you will never know what it is you want out of love. 

Capricorn

Your Card: Six of Swords

You must learn how to trust others with your heart again, Capricorn. You’re so used to being disappointed that you’ve gotten to the point that it’s much easier to keep your walls up and hold others at a distance. You put up such a tough exterior, hiding the fact that behind that resting bitch face, is someone who is deeply afraid of getting hurt again. I’m sorry that so many people have hurt you and taken you for granted, but you can’t let these ghosts of your pasts manifest into projections of the future. You don’t have to trust right away, but give people a chance to prove you wrong. Not everyone has malicious intent. Though you’ve been burned in the past, you can’t let this skew you’re judgment of others or else you will push away people who have good intentions and take loyalty seriously. 

Aquarius

Your Card: Four of Wands

You must learn to have an identity outside of your romantic relationships, Aquarius. When it comes to matters of love, you are either incredibly hard to tie down or you’re completely obsessed with the person you’re with so much so that you tend to think that you don’t need anybody else. This isn’t sustainable in the long run, Aquarius. Your partner cannot be the only person in your life. You must learn to hold on to yourself and your individuality as well as the people in your life who have always supported you. I know you’re not doing this intentionally, but don’t turn your back on them. This makes them think you’re only calling when you need something. 

Pisces

Your Card: Ten of Wands

I hate this phrase cause I think it’s so corny and borderline satire but I think it applies to you, Pisces. “If you can’t handle me at my worst, then you don’t deserve me at my best.” With that said Pisces, you must understand that as great and fulfilling as the highs of a relationship can be, are you willing to fight through the lows? At times you tend to be a black and white thinker. Things are either completely good or completely bad. You leave little room for the gray area. But this thinking is not realistic. Life and the people who inhabit it are incredibly complex. We all have our good moments, and we all have our bad moments. It is naive to think otherwise. With that said, before you are ready to love again, you must be prepared for the not-so-glamorous aspects of relationships. Things get ugly sometimes but that doesn’t mean it’s not meant to be. Love is supposed to take work. It is a huge responsibility that shouldn’t be taken lightly.