Don’t Fall In Love With Your Situationship

Don’t stay the night at his apartment, even if you’re absolutely exhausted and nothing sounds more comforting than the thought of falling asleep slowly, right next to him. Call the Lyft. Don’t kiss him goodbye when it finally arrives and don’t ask him what he’s doing the next day. Walk out his door and act as though you’re unfazed. Be too proud to show how much you truly care because you know deep down how these things go. Understand that he will be no different than the last.

Go home alone. Don’t text him to let him know you got there safely or that you had an amazing time talking about how he got his scars and how you’ve already memorized the notes of his peculiar laugh. Don’t remind him to listen to “Chinatown” by Bleachers and definitely don’t send him an article that reminds you of everything you just discussed.

Crawl into bed and swipe on Hinge because you know better than to get too attached to the ephemeral. Swipe and swipe and swipe but find no one that looks interesting enough to grab a drink with.

Wish it could be him. Swallow the feeling. Ignore the thought. But accidentally return to the first conversation you had on the app with him. Notice he updated his profile since. Understand that he is definitely no different than the last.

Ignore his text for five hours the next day until you finally reply and say, “Be there in a bit.” Walk into his apartment. Don’t kiss him hello. Don’t notice the amber flecks in his eyes. Don’t compliment his mind. Don’t get too close. Don’t thank him for the cabernet sauvignon. Drink it quickly. Wish you never met him. Know after tonight, you’ll never see him again because you can’t do it to yourself, not again.

Don’t fall in love with your situationship because it will only break your heart.