Stop Searching For Closure: Things That Will Make Healing From Your Heartache Harder
It’s never easy to get over a heartbreak, whether you were in a long-term relationship or had a huge crush that lasted years. However, it’s always possible to move on. It might take some time and some tears, but you can do it! To help you along your journey, here are some things that will make healing from your heartache take longer:
Keeping tabs on your e-lover. Everyone gets curious. You’re allowed to check in on what they’re up to once in a while – but does it really matter how they’re doing? Does it really matter whether they’re in a new relationship or are still single? Ask yourself whether scrolling through their pictures is going to help you heal or prolong the pain. If it’s the latter, then block them on social media (or at least mute them), so you don’t have constant reminders of how much you miss them. The first step to getting them out of your mind is getting them out of your sight.
Replaying the memories on a loop. It’s okay to miss them. It’s okay to look back on the times you shared with a smile. But you don’t want a million reminders of them sprawled across your home. For a while, until your heart heals, stop listening to the songs that remind you of them. Delete their photos or move them to a location you can’t easily access. Put away the jewelry and t-shirts they bought you. Don’t let a good day get ruined by walking into your room and seeing something that reminds you of them when they’re the last thing you want to think about.
Closing off your heart. Even though you might not be ready for a relationship again, you shouldn’t close off your heart completely. Let yourself flirt when you stumble upon someone attractive. Let yourself feel intense feelings instead of pushing them away out of fear of getting hurt again. You don’t have to jump straight into another relationship, but you don’t have to swear off of dating ever again either. There’s a healthy balance.
Isolating yourself. You might need some time to hide in your room and cry about what’s happened, but you don’t want to push away the family and friends who care about you. Keeping busy could help you move on with your life. Whether you’re working hard at a job you adore or are partying with your friends or are babysitting family members, it can all help you remember that you have a life outside of your relationship. You have worth that goes beyond your relationship status.
Getting too obsessed with closure. Sometimes, you need to move on without answers. You don’t want to be stalking their social media, trying to play detective and figure out why they walked away from you. If they don’t give you an answer about why they’re leaving, that shows what kind of person they are. They don’t care enough about your feelings to fill you in on their feelings – which means they weren’t right for you, no matter what caused them to go.