You Don’t Have To Give That Toxic Human Another Chance

You don’t have to give them another chance just because they’re asking for one, because they’re down on their knees, because they’re crying about how much they love you and couldn’t imagine living without you. The cold hard truth is, it doesn’t matter whether they love you. It matters how they treat you. If they are disrespecting you and causing you constant pain, then they don’t deserve another second of your time. Remember, you don’t have to take them back because they’re interested. They don’t get to determine the trajectory of your relationship. You have agency too. You have the power to walk away.

You don’t have to give them another chance just because you’re used to having them around, because forgiving them has become a pattern, because this has happened before and will happen again. Instead of automatically forgiving them time and time again because you feel like it’s what you’re supposed to do, ask yourself whether they have actually earned your forgiveness. Ask yourself whether anything has changed. Sure, they’ve promised that they’re never going to hurt you again, but haven’t they made those same promises before? You don’t have to give them another opportunity to let you down. You can end things right here, right now.

You don’t have to give them another chance just because you’re afraid of jumping back into the dating pool, because you are used to being in a relationship, because you don’t want to be single again. Even though such a big change is going to impact your life in a million little ways, you need to overpower your fear. You don’t want to stay in an uncomfortable situation just because it’s familiar. Don’t let yourself get comfortable being treated poorly. Don’t trick yourself into believing staying is better than starting over again. Yes, you might have trouble finding your footing at first, but in a few months or years you’re going to be feeling better than you’ve ever felt before. Leaving will be worth it. 

You don’t have to give them another chance just because you have history, because you’ve been through a lot together, because you made them a promise you would stay. Dreams change. Situations change. You’re allowed to want something different now that you wanted when you were younger, especially when this person isn’t who you thought. Especially when you’ve been dealing with toxic, unfair treatment. Even if you’re the one who technically ends the relationship, their horrible behavior is the reason why things had to end. This isn’t on you. Remember, you don’t owe them anything. You aren’t obligated to stick around for them or your parents or your children. Your loved ones want you to be happy – and if this relationship is making you miserable, they’ll be proud of you for leaving. Even if they aren’t, you should be proud of yourself.

You don’t have to give them another chance. You don’t have to prolong this relationship that has been bringing you down. You don’t have to accept their apology or move past what they’ve done to you. You can walk away. You can do it. You can.