This Is The New Fad You Absolutely Hate, Based On Your Zodiac Sign

PISCES: AUDIOBOOKS

Pisces can’t get their fan fic, sci-fi, fantasy fix in an auditory manner. With that many made up settings and character names, it drives them absolutely wild not knowing how anything is spelled. Note being able to dog ear a page. To physically feel how much of a story is left with their hands.

ARIES: TOO MANY STREAMING APPS 

There’s nothing Aries hates more than being in the middle of a series rewatch when the content rights expire and having to figure out where it went and what episode you were on. They live in perpetual fear of how many subscriptions they are paying for that never get used.

TAURUS: LAYERED NECKLACES

Taurus spends top dollar on their jewelry, but can’t pull off this look without everything getting tangled and looking a mess. They don’t have the time or energy to play the “separate the chain ball” game.

GEMINI: UNLIMITED PTO

Gemini needs rules and structure. While the concept of unlimited PTO is a positive in theory, it just causes way too much anxiety in their minds over whether they are taking too much or too little, and how their decisions are being perceived by everyone else at their job.

CANCER: BODYSUITS

They’re just not practical enough for Cancer, and maybe there’s a little bit of PTSD from a childhood gymnastics and dance class where the panic set in once you finally realized just how hard it was to get out of that unitard in the public bathroom.

LEO: DERMAPLANING

Leo is a very live and let live sign, but they draw the line at spraying dry shampoo onto your face to be able to see your peach fuzz. If the whole point is to get rid of something you would never even see without spraying a powder on your face, it sounds like creating a problem that never needed to be fixed. 

VIRGO: APP TRACKING PERMISSIONS

Virgo refuses to answer the same question twice, even if it’s on their cell phone. If they don’t want to be tracked by one app, they don’t want to be tracked by any, so there should be a one-click, opt out of everything solution, that allows them to move on with their lives and not be bothered by the nonsense.

LIBRA: CANNED COCKTAILS

Libra gets it, okay. Convenience, portability, good marketing. But every time they have a party, and everyone brings their own twelve pack of something, their fridge is undoubtedly full of all the leftover seltzer and hard kombucha flavors no one wanted to drink themselves. And they sit there taking up space for months, when Libra just wants room for meal prep. 

SCORPIO: PROMOTING MUSIC ON TIKTOK

The ultimate music buff loves a good ear worm, but can’t handle the amount of times a good hook goes viral, only to belong to a song that can’t stand on its own two feet as a whole. Scorpios miss the days when you could listen to a whole album on repeat without needing to skip any dud tracks.

SAGITTARIUS: WIDE LEGGED JEANS

Sagittarius is an old soul with a passion for travel. Their fashion choices are always going to be classic and functional. Think Anthony Bourdain in a linen shirt and a really good pair of sunglasses. They’re too busy jet setting to give their wardrobe a complete overhaul every time fads change drastically.

CAPRICORN: CANCELLATION FEES FOR RESERVATIONS

People get sick. People get dumped, and stood up, or blown off, or food poisoning, and restaurants should not charge you more than an actual meal for an unexpected life event. It’s just not fair, and even when you’re a planner, it still doesn’t mean you have a crystal ball.

AQUARIUS: LAMINATED BROWS

Aquarius just can’t get on this train because they don’t like the texture of crunchy brows, and always feel a little startled every time they look in the mirror. Something about all those hairs standing straight up just reminds them of an exclamation mark.